let's talk about self-esteem
Let’s start off with some facts. I hate certain parts of my body, I hate my thighs (like a lot of people) I have cellulite, I have the tummy… I’ve gained about 5kg the past 3 months. I have stretch marks from my really chubby times. But you know what, I really, really, REALLY don’t care. I love my body! I love my curves! I just don’t have time anymore worrying about the little things.
That’s why I did the “naked calendar” J I just want to be, “fuck you this is what I look like!”. (I might have a slight attitude problem ^^ haha). I was obviously the one there least in shape.. But so what? Hell yes! Love the skin you in! :D It’s all about how you feel on the inside, the soul or what ever you call it.
I’ll also admit I’m aware that we do judge people from what we see, but with age (wisdom hits like a thunderstorm! Cool shit) I have also realized how important that “little extra” really is. I have no preferences any longer. I can’t say I prefer a special type of guys. Some are skinny and some aren’t. Some have dark hair, and some are blond. I’m more then convinced I fall for charm, a smile and beautiful eyes. Yes, call me a dork. But I can’t help it… those little things are what makes my knees weak from time to time. ;)
Haha Ok, that’s all I had to say on such a serious matter! But it’s something close to heart. And I felt today after the naked photo shoot would be the best time to bring it up. + I’m making lussebullar (lucia buns) and trust me those aren’t fat free.. and I don’t care!!
awesome... just awesome.
love it...
Todays theme is death by the way. if now anyone was wondering.
As usual I'm all dressed in black (what can I say, I like it!)... I chose sleep over shower = hairdo is more of a cluster fuck then an actual hairdo or it simply looked like if something flew in there.. got tangled, before it eventually died.
No, and the only pathetic attempt I could do to save me from creating yet another painful childhood memory was to put on some mascara... which Fyi, I never have the energy to put on.
No I guess our dear hall neighbour was right, today I'm going around looking like death.
Todays theme is death by the way. if now anyone was wondering.
As usual I'm all dressed in black (what can I say, I like it!)... I chose sleep over shower = hairdo is more of a cluster fuck then an actual hairdo or it simply looked like if something flew in there.. got tangled, before it eventually died.
No, and the only pathetic attempt I could do to save me from creating yet another painful childhood memory was to put on some mascara... which Fyi, I never have the energy to put on.
No I guess our dear hall neighbour was right, today I'm going around looking like death.
today christmas found itself very present in the love shack penthouse
Oh yeah babes, we re-named our appartment!
But today we have all been singing to the amazing songs of christmas, most played? pfft, "fairytale of New York" by the Pogues OFC! what gives more christmas spirit then:
You´re a bum you´re a punk
You´re an old slut on junk
Lying there almost dead on a drip in that bed
You scumbag you maggot
You cheap lousy faggot
Happy christmas your arse I pray god it´s our last.
You´re an old slut on junk
Lying there almost dead on a drip in that bed
You scumbag you maggot
You cheap lousy faggot
Happy christmas your arse I pray god it´s our last.
There's no other song like it, a favourite from before I knew how to say hello in english!
And the christmas joy of today has been followed up by dancing and singing off key, just like it should be. And then we did a little roadtrip to morrisons.. hells yes people! Loving the life right now!
Just finished my concept map. So now I can leave for the Movie night whithout too much guilt. Iäm finally gonna see my first Ingmarg Bergman movie -and I WILL love it! even if it is the crapiest movie ever created, just 'cuz it is swedish.
BTW: I got an enormous swedish flag for my birthday. What do I do with it? I hung it on my wall... but seriously.. haha everytime I see it it makes me kind of uncomfortable.. every swede out there understan what I'm talking about. But, what do I do with it!?
our new lecturer is like the dementors in harry potter
.. she just sucks every will to live right out of you within 5 min!
goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood (the daily blasphemy).. I hate you right now.
And it didn't help that we where locked out of our economics class!!! sort of..
and then we (read me and annika) suffured through the worst sugarkick I've ever had.
The brain function was at a level so low that the only thing that actually made any sense is the Donald Duck VS Mickey Mouse discussion. Donald is awesome, because he's a black woman in a duck body.
goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood (the daily blasphemy).. I hate you right now.
And it didn't help that we where locked out of our economics class!!! sort of..
and then we (read me and annika) suffured through the worst sugarkick I've ever had.
The brain function was at a level so low that the only thing that actually made any sense is the Donald Duck VS Mickey Mouse discussion. Donald is awesome, because he's a black woman in a duck body.
a quote by a very wise woman:
"It's not about the size.. It's all about the pleasure it gives"
Me.. Regarding magnum mini..
entering my 3rd decade in style!
HUGE THANKS FOR ALL THE GRATULATIONS TODAY! :) And all of you who just made my day completly amazing!
Could defenitly not have asked for anything more. And tomorrow I'm just gonna select one of the thé brands my family at home sended me :) Put on my slippers (with .. what's the name for it.. erhm the slipping protection for small childen basically ^^ NEEDED! haha) and then walk around in our flat with my strip mug ;) Haha it's the gift that just keeps giving! :D haha
and also I finally got my own big ass swedish flag! I've never had one.. my family has never had one.. I don't know what to do with it.. so as I so smoothly told Ellie "What do I do with it? eh, I'm just gonna sleep with it!"
very honourable
Well, I got tones of fornication and most important age superiority.. What more could a girl who has no interest in becoming impregnated ask for?!
MASS FORNICATION AND SEXUAL IMORTALITY TO YOU ALL, LOTS OF LOVE!
Sooooo tired! GRATTIS PÅ FÖDELSEDAGEN TILL MIG SJÄLV!
Could defenitly not have asked for anything more. And tomorrow I'm just gonna select one of the thé brands my family at home sended me :) Put on my slippers (with .. what's the name for it.. erhm the slipping protection for small childen basically ^^ NEEDED! haha) and then walk around in our flat with my strip mug ;) Haha it's the gift that just keeps giving! :D haha
and also I finally got my own big ass swedish flag! I've never had one.. my family has never had one.. I don't know what to do with it.. so as I so smoothly told Ellie "What do I do with it? eh, I'm just gonna sleep with it!"
very honourable
Well, I got tones of fornication and most important age superiority.. What more could a girl who has no interest in becoming impregnated ask for?!
MASS FORNICATION AND SEXUAL IMORTALITY TO YOU ALL, LOTS OF LOVE!
Sooooo tired! GRATTIS PÅ FÖDELSEDAGEN TILL MIG SJÄLV!
pre-raisin weekend.
ok, all ready to hit my moma's house (have to be there @9am).
I'll let you know ooon... tuesday if I survived. unless I really don't wanna blog on my b-day. Then I'll let you know on wednesday.
Anyhow! Away we go with a bottle of rum!
older pic. but I think I look rather bad-ass in it (not).
I'll let you know ooon... tuesday if I survived. unless I really don't wanna blog on my b-day. Then I'll let you know on wednesday.
Anyhow! Away we go with a bottle of rum!
older pic. but I think I look rather bad-ass in it (not).
father and daugher time
FUN! gonna spend my saturday showing my oldman and annethe around town :)
and ofc, I have planned the day with activities suitable for their age (my dad's that is.. pretty sure annethe could keep up haha).
First of Golfing
Then show them DRA (and most important.. get my gifts^^)
Then drink afternoon thé
Go back into town and show them..well...uhmm.. moving on to lunch!
show them more of town (still haven't figured out what that mean exactly)
FIKA <--- the most important event on a sweds day. without this... we DON'T function.
show them the beaches.
hopefully after that they can tell me what they want to do. And if I know them correctly (which, I do) they will probably want to shop.. stuff. most likely golf stuff.. and H&M stuff.. and chrismas stuff.
But I love having them here!!! Just to show them my golf skills and to hug them! what can I say, I love my hugs. haha ;)
(warning for random, emotional, lame, slanter.. and o, I wasn't drunk when I wr)
And I love that they are as amazing as they are! I'm probably one of the luckiest people on earth! I have a cool family that can talk about everything! haha my dad's face when mentioning ALL details on raisin weekend ;) haha and afterwards he just gave me that same "oh my.." that he has been given me for years after tattoos and drinking. Because we do trust each other enough to talk about everything! :) (ok.. I don't tell my parents eeevry part of my life, and I don't want to know everything about theirs.. privacy is important)
ahaa... haha family love!! and now everyone knoes the reason behind my tattoo and why I think it's important! :)
and ofc, I have planned the day with activities suitable for their age (my dad's that is.. pretty sure annethe could keep up haha).
First of Golfing
Then show them DRA (and most important.. get my gifts^^)
Then drink afternoon thé
Go back into town and show them..well...uhmm.. moving on to lunch!
show them more of town (still haven't figured out what that mean exactly)
FIKA <--- the most important event on a sweds day. without this... we DON'T function.
show them the beaches.
hopefully after that they can tell me what they want to do. And if I know them correctly (which, I do) they will probably want to shop.. stuff. most likely golf stuff.. and H&M stuff.. and chrismas stuff.
But I love having them here!!! Just to show them my golf skills and to hug them! what can I say, I love my hugs. haha ;)
(warning for random, emotional, lame, slanter.. and o, I wasn't drunk when I wr)
And I love that they are as amazing as they are! I'm probably one of the luckiest people on earth! I have a cool family that can talk about everything! haha my dad's face when mentioning ALL details on raisin weekend ;) haha and afterwards he just gave me that same "oh my.." that he has been given me for years after tattoos and drinking. Because we do trust each other enough to talk about everything! :) (ok.. I don't tell my parents eeevry part of my life, and I don't want to know everything about theirs.. privacy is important)
ahaa... haha family love!! and now everyone knoes the reason behind my tattoo and why I think it's important! :)
rocksöc is defenitly more..naked..than I would imagine it to be.
Haha no complains thou!! ;) Shit made me feel like I was in the middle of a midsummer celebration or something! darn good music (most which I had never hear of before... and some -sorry guys- just wasn't that good), nudity, to much alcohol... always those few people. The only thing that was missing was the big as drama..
But I think I need help, and not in a AA kind of way -the opposite! Don't get me wrong (mom mostly) I don't like being drunk, pissed, shitfaced... etc etc. haha but I have a peak for 1h.. then I get TIRED!? And my english goes straight out of the room. I would even dare to say my english language + understanding commit suicude. So don't be alarmed if I seem a bit "air-headed"... and not contributing to conversations.. that's just my brain working like the google translator (and we al know how precise that shit is) haha
Well well!!! I'm just so excited for RAISIN WEEKEND!!!!!! :D Gona be soooo nice! and hopefully my body will function better so I won't become a creature from resident evil (unless it's the hot blond)
But I think I need help, and not in a AA kind of way -the opposite! Don't get me wrong (mom mostly) I don't like being drunk, pissed, shitfaced... etc etc. haha but I have a peak for 1h.. then I get TIRED!? And my english goes straight out of the room. I would even dare to say my english language + understanding commit suicude. So don't be alarmed if I seem a bit "air-headed"... and not contributing to conversations.. that's just my brain working like the google translator (and we al know how precise that shit is) haha
Well well!!! I'm just so excited for RAISIN WEEKEND!!!!!! :D Gona be soooo nice! and hopefully my body will function better so I won't become a creature from resident evil (unless it's the hot blond)
Thursday.. (i think..)
Got a test in.... 1,5 h! and how much has Sandra studied? Well... WAAAY to little would be one way to describe it. Basically I'm fucked. And I know, I promised my dear beloved mother I would stop using fuck, shit.. in all landuages. (merd!) But I believe this is one of the occations that I can make a exception to the no-cursing rule. Because... well I'm fucked.
Satans PERKELE!!!!! hopefully my mom is not aware of finnish cursewords quite yet.
But it's all under control. I've learned from management that what people do when they feel stressed is to:
1: find closest corner
2: coil up in fetal position
3: cry uncontrollably
4: think of something that makes you happy, like.. flowers.
5: stay in this position until you've missed you test.
Problem solved.
So that's what I'll be up to the following 3 hours. Then I'll head to julias' for cookies and thé
Satans PERKELE!!!!! hopefully my mom is not aware of finnish cursewords quite yet.
But it's all under control. I've learned from management that what people do when they feel stressed is to:
1: find closest corner
2: coil up in fetal position
3: cry uncontrollably
4: think of something that makes you happy, like.. flowers.
5: stay in this position until you've missed you test.
Problem solved.
So that's what I'll be up to the following 3 hours. Then I'll head to julias' for cookies and thé
FML
What have I ever done to god?! (More then generally not believing in him and using his name in vain..)
I just wanna go home.. But no, I get stuck in traffic on the motorway outside of glasgow, I'm hungry as shit, I in "that time" of the month.. And I really, really have to pee!! Jesus! Been holding it now for 6h!! O_O
Noooo.. God this won't do. This won't do at all...
Best regards
A very unhappy bladder
Going home.
will be heading back to St Andrews in.. a couple of hours. (darn.. ) But awesome days here in London! :D
Got my tattoo finally. And I managed to participate in the student demonstration about funding cuts for schools (yeaah not really sure it affects us in scotland.. pretty sure it doesn't.. but it's a good cause! considering all my english schooling friends). We left the demonstration just as it got "good" apperently. Soem people did a "gothenburg riots" re-run and decided to storm the headquarters of the conservative party, break a lot of windows and start a fire outside it. The usual "oh we're so pist off" stuff.
Off course I shopped some and just hung out ;) LOVE LONDON!
Got my tattoo finally. And I managed to participate in the student demonstration about funding cuts for schools (yeaah not really sure it affects us in scotland.. pretty sure it doesn't.. but it's a good cause! considering all my english schooling friends). We left the demonstration just as it got "good" apperently. Soem people did a "gothenburg riots" re-run and decided to storm the headquarters of the conservative party, break a lot of windows and start a fire outside it. The usual "oh we're so pist off" stuff.
Off course I shopped some and just hung out ;) LOVE LONDON!
gör klart allt innan London..
7pm går bussen från St Andrews! sen kommer jag vara på en buss mer eller mindre tills 7am.. :D
Ska hinna städa rummet först lite och ta hand om min disk. Ska äta ett ordentligt mål mat, svamp risotto med sparris och halloumi maybe? blir nog bra vad det än blir :) Ska göra en dubbel sats så jag har när jag kommer tillbaka på torsdag.
YES! jag är excited for my London trip!
Ska hinna städa rummet först lite och ta hand om min disk. Ska äta ett ordentligt mål mat, svamp risotto med sparris och halloumi maybe? blir nog bra vad det än blir :) Ska göra en dubbel sats så jag har när jag kommer tillbaka på torsdag.
YES! jag är excited for my London trip!
penthouse motto
"spreading the Love... and spreading our legs"
(+ everything with tesco value in it)
(+ everything with tesco value in it)
upsatsen är klar!
Så nu kan jag gå ut och njuta av min neon teamade kväll utan ångest!!
kanske inte den mest upp peppande party låten, men halleluja moment! En av de vackraste låtarna på denna jord! :)
kanske inte den mest upp peppande party låten, men halleluja moment! En av de vackraste låtarna på denna jord! :)
the playlist whilst writing my essay:
Daniel Adams-Ray - Dum av Dig
Timbuktu ft Supreme - de löser sig
Timbuktu ft Supreme - de löser sig
dagens
Duck sauce - Barbara Streisand
and Daniel Adams-Ray - Gubben i lådan
and Daniel Adams-Ray - Gubben i lådan
welcome to the club!
was going for the more well... smart look? yeeaaahh apparently you can't fake everything! Or maybe it's just the liseberg pen?
Well well... here they are anyway, my new glasses. The whole CK glory of them. It feelt like being touch by god during management (that sounded slightly perverted... mm but I think god is one sick bastard anyway so.. haha). I could finally see the slides!!! Halleluja sistahs and brothers!
Have to run to golf now, stupid scottish rain.. grrrmh, stupid weather. pfft. I curse the day you were born!!
